Are you one of those folks that just disappear if they want to dump a boring person at an event? There are more stylish ways of doing so. I personally enjoy conversing with pretty much everybody, as I reckon that no person on this earth is boring. However, I did develop my little techniques for situations in which I have talked to a person enough and am now ready to chat with other people. The common denominator of all of these strategies is: add value to your interlocutor.
Introduce them to someone else
Look around: is there anyone you know? If yes, introduce this contact to the boring guy. If the two share synergies, even better! Make sure you follow our guide to offline introductions to create rapport between the parties. Once they start conversing, inform them discretely that you have to go see someone else. If you have done your connecting homework well, they won’t even notice your absence that much. You will have provided value to them, and at the same time you’ll be able to finally catch up with an existing contact or approach that person you’ve been wanting to talk to all evening.
Create a group
However, sometimes the group you have just created is so interesting that you actually want to stay! Also, you can plan on building a group from the very beginning. In both cases, just make sure you introduce the two (or more) people following the above indications. Try to keep the conversation going about the synergies these people share, or about topics everyone in the group has something to say about. The value you are creating here is compelling content on one side and enjoyable human connections on the other.
Ask them for an introduction
If you don’t know anybody else at the event, or simply wish to meet new people, ask your interlocutor whether they have a lot of contacts there, and if they are willing to introduce you. Of course, we want to phrase this request in a way that can add value too. Something like “Do you know of any people at this event that share the same expertise as me, or would benefit from it?”. This way, you are not just providing value to these folks: you are also offering your interlocutor the opportunity to be a connector, which involves a whole series of benefits (article on this coming soon!).
Suggest moving together
When it’s your turn to talk, say something about the topic of discussion and then go “By the way, I actually wanted to pay a quick visit to the restroom: do you have to go as well?”. Another version could be “A propos, how about getting something at the bar / buffet table?”. You can propose the destination you prefer, but pick something of value, even if just on a practical level (such as physiological needs). The most important thing here is the change of location. On the way to the new spot, look around, make eye contact with people and engage in conversations. These new dynamics will create opportunities in the interaction with the boring guy too!
Over to you now: create your techniques and let us know how they worked out! Just make sure you actually add value to the person you wish to “dump”. Good luck